How to Write a Paper about the Crisis of Democracy?

Cheerful reception of the “How to Write a Law and Technology Paper?” convinced me that the format has comedy potential. The same disclaimer as previously applies here: this post is for laughs. Of course, I am worried about the state of democracy. But I am also skeptical of the value of repeating the same diagnosis and analysis over and over again. On a theoretical level, a question is crystalizing in my mind: “what is the value of repeating stuff that everyone in a community already knows?” There must be some, otherwise, why do we keep doing it? One day I will attempt an answer. After a few more “ten steps” is suppose. Today, however, enjoy the Friday piece of sit-down-comedy:

Are you concerned about the course that local and global politics have taken lately? Would you like to be remembered as someone who was not indifferent, and tried to have an impact? Does the prospect of actually going to the streets to talk to people and maybe help someone scare you as too much movement and effort? If the answer to all these questions is “yes”, you probably should write a paper about the crisis of democracy. A perfect way to feel like you’re doing something good for society, without actually having to do much.

“But I am no political theorist / constitutional lawyer! what do I know?” – is the thought that might pop up in your head, but be sure to disregard it. Unlike with natural (real) sciences, everyone is an expert on politics, constitution, and democracy.  After a couple of beers especially. Plus, you can use our instruction: How to write a paper about the crisis of democracy (in ten steps):

1. Start by saying that it seemed in 1989 that it’s the end of history. Cite Fukuyama (and call him a “Neo-Con”. Mention he seems to have changed his mind. Make a little joke about that).
2. Say that now, however, there are problems all around the world. Be sure to mention Russia, Trump, Turkey, Poland, Brexit, Philipinnes, Brazil and Hungary in the same sentence.
3. Cite some numbers about how inequality is rising, growth stagnating, whatever, you need numbers (quote Piketty). Say that people nowadays will not be richer than their parents. Call them “losers of globalization”.
4. Mention China and that maybe actually there is no necessary connection between democracy and market economy. Remind people that Hayek was friends with Pinochet.
5. Be sure to include that democracy in the West might not be that democratic at all – refer to Citizens United and money in politics in general.
6. Indicate that causes are actually even more complicated: economy, culture, ideology all play some role.
7. Say that we are probably doomed. Add an analogy between today and the 1930s. Then say that we do not really know how it’s gonna go. Say that you predict that democracy will go down, or not, or maybe it will change.
8. Add a splash here and there of buzzwords like “democratic backsliding”, “populism”, “illiberal”, “losers of globalization”. DO NOT ever explain what you mean by democracy or crisis. You must use the term “rule of law” very abundantly and make sure you conflate it with democracy.
9. Propose to solve the problem by something that sounds simple but is actually very unclear: education, inclusion, regulation of social media. If you want to call your work “interdisciplinary”, mention blockchain.
10. Say that of course more research is needed, but you wanted to just “start a debate” which is very important.

Congratulations! You just landed on a good side of history! If everything indeed goes down, you will be able to demonstrate that you cared. And if not, one of your predictions materialized, and you were a part of the movement! win-win.

Thanks to Nik and Fil for their comments about the “first draft”, haha.